Here There Be Bugs

I know that this will sound very odd to people other than those in the Bay Area but, guys: guess what?! There are BUGS here! All over the place! I don't mean the occasional brief influx of ants at a certain time of year in one's kitchen...marching in a long processional to look around your kitchen only to discover that you've double-wrapped all the food and laid ant traps in anticipation of their visit, at which point they calmly march back out. No, no no, it's not like that here.

Here, sometimes a FLY will come into your home! We had to buy an actual flyswatter! The big thrill at breakfast was how we were going to rid ourselves of this slow, dumb fly that was circling the breakfast table. Baxter was extremely impressed that I got the job done...little did he know that there is really no challenge involved in smacking a large, dumb fly that is just sitting in the middle of the floor. Of course, I accepted his praise as if I had truly done something remarkable, knowing full well that there are years ahead when praise from my children might be, um, well, scarce.

And spiders! Anytime you turn around, inside or out, there could be a spider there. How cool is that? Ants, too. Not the little San Francisco ants, tiny little underfed things - no, these are the really big deep-dish sausage pizza eating ants. I should note that of course there are mosquitoes here, but for some reason none of us has been bitten yet, so I have nothing more to say on that matter. Yet, anyway. Give me time.